'Whereas Christianity views personal transformation as a necessary and reliable platform for relationships, the modern script of "authenticity" sees personal change as an inherent threat to relationships and vice versa. Young people often describe a dualism in how they sees their lives across time. There twenties are seen as the time for discovery and change, with their thirties the decade for stability and settling down: now is for "self," and later is for "others." It is a mystery, though how this transition is meant to take place. It is akin to the Olympic hopeful who decides to leave training until the event itself.'
Jonathan Grant, Divine Sex, p.47.